Okay, readers! The main feature was a particularly brutal offering, so bear with and we will try to get through this as best is possible.
Let the experiment begin!
Experiment #110 ~ ROBOT HOLOCAUST (1986) with short
Commando Cody and the Radar Men from the Moon (1952) ~ (Ch. 9)(partial)
Original Air Date: Approx: 1/90
Genre: SciFi
Studio: Tycin Entertainment Productiions ~ (Distributed by Beyond Infinity - Direct to Video)
Starring:Norris Culf, Nadine Hart, Joel Von Ornsteiner, Jennifer Delorea, Michael Downend, Angelika Jager, Rick Gianasi
Directed By: Tim Kincaid
Theatrical Running Time: 79 Minutes
Tagline: "IT'S MACHINE VS. MAN IN THE ULTIMATE BATTLE FOR THE FUTURE!"
... but FIRST! ...
Short:Title: (Chapter Nine) ~
BATTLE IN THE STRATOSPHEREGenre: Action/SciFi
Studio: A Republic Picture
Starring: George Wallace, Aline Towne, Roy Barcroft, William Bakewell, Clayton Moore
Directed By: Fred C. Bannon
Chapter Running Time: 14 Minutes
Tagline: N/A
Shorts Chapter Synopsis: Commando Cody uses a captured Moon man's motorized tank (and his uniform) to steal away the dreaded element, Lunarium. Cody, along with his co-hort Ted, try to escape with the element from the pursuing Moon guards. As the action begins to... simmer, the SOL's theater screen goes white as the film breaks and...
...and now... OUR FEATURE PRESENTATION!
Film Synopsis: A voice over introduces us to "the last city standing on New Terra after the robot rebellion of '33", which resulted in a radiation spill, poisoning the atmosphere. The survivors are known as 'Airslaves'. Robots now rule over the Airslaves under the leadership of their master, The 'Dark One'.
An outsider from the wastelands named Neo (
Norris Culf) and his robot Klyton (
Joel Von Ornsteiner) enter the city and join a small crowd in a factory, watching a wrestling contest to the death between two combatants. The victor will be taken to the 'Power Station' to receive his reward, which just happens to be death. This is how the Dark One controls the Airslaves (aside from manipulating the flow of 'good air / bad air'), by preventing any survivor that is strong enough to lead a rebellion from coming into power.
An enforcer robot named Torque (
Rick Gianasi) demands a winner in the contest. When the crowd rebels, the breatheable atmosphere is shut off by one of the Dark One's assistants, Valaria (
Anjelika Jager), causing the slaves to collapse to the floor. That is... except for one young woman, Deeja (
Nadine Hart) and her scientist father Jorn (
Michael Downend). Jorn is taken away by Torque to the Power Station.
Neo and his inept robot, along with Deeja and a couple of other 'Airslave fighters' set out for the station to seek the help of a friend of Neo's in an attempt to rescue Deeja's father. On their journey they first enter the 'She-Zone', where they encounter a group of feral women who hate all men, use them only to propogate their tribe and then destroy them. After a failed combat challenge the leader of the feminists, Nyla (
Jennifer Delora) agrees to help the group of ragtag misfits find their way to the Power Station.
The next challenge they must face is getting through 'The Caverns'. Neo informs the group that the Dark one cannot monitor their activities while they are in the subterranean caves. The caverns reveal that they are the home of 'Sewage Worms', blind creatures that hunt their prey by sound. (
Actually, they are sock puppets. No, I'm not kidding! Extras with their arms sleeved in fabric, reaching through the walls of the film set! Sad, really). The group fights their way through the caverns (ironically blathering, yelling and making as much noise as possible), emerging back on the surface only to be attacked next by mutants. A fight ensues, but Neo's robot puts up a force field and the team moves on to the rescue.
Valaria, sensing that the rebels are still pressing toward the Power Station, dispatches Torque to intercept them and kill Deeja. Meanwhile, Jorn continues to be tortured in the Room of Questions by the still unseen Dark One and his minions.
The Airslave fighters arrive at the entrance to the Power Station and find the crucified body of Neo's friend, as well as other 'victors' of the New Terran death-matches. They descend into the station and are warned by Klyton that many traps are everywhere...
OKAY! That's It!!!... I can't take anymore! I'm gonna just wrap this mess up!
One of the freedom fighters gets killed by Torque as a warning to the others. The feral Queen gets menaced by the 'Beast of the Web' (silly string and a papier-mache claw being thrust into frame from off-screen) and gets set free. Some slaves of the Dark One concoct a plan to starve him of power by feeding the machine dirt instead of energy. The Dark One threatens to kill Valaria if the rebels proceed any farther. Another of the rebels gets killed, 'chest-burster' style, by another sock puppet. Valeria's plan fails to stop the rebels and Dark One takes vengeance upon her, blasting her face off, revealing that
she is actually a robot. Really upset, Valaria proceeds to engage the self-destruct function of the station. Torque turns the self-destruct mechanism off, attempts to kill Neo, but the feral Queen sacrifices herself to save him.
Deeja confronts the Dark One (who turns out to be a giant computer) and is taken to her father by Valaria (who's not quite so angry now). Jorn has at this point been 'joined' to the Dark One and is now just a human head on top of a large, globulous, egg-shaped sac. Pops begs for his daughter to kill him, but she can't do it. Neo kills Torque, Klyton kills Valaria, and Neo kills Deeja's father which in turn kills the power depleted Dark One. The slaves celebrate their freedom, Deeja is really pissed at Neo, yet vows to return to her people to carry on her father's work(?) and Neo and Klyton walk off into the sunset.
Intro: Joel explains the premise of the show then goes on, with the help of Servo and Crow, to sing the 'Hu-man Blues'.
Invention Exchange: (
Joel) "Well... you know how it is on Earth where you have those giant enclosed stadiums and you can't smoke in them, and I thought it was peculiar 'cause you can drive giant 'Hell-Belching Monster Trucks' in 'em, but you can't smoke!" Joel presents the 'Nitro-Burning-Funny-Pipe' ( a tobacco pipe shaped like a flame-belching 'Transformer' truck so a smoker can induldge at an arena event... like truck races).
Dr. F. and Larry present 'Articulated Face Burglar Masks', (the eyebrows move on the hooded masks...to allow greater expression when wearing them while commiting a crime)!
Host Segments:Host 1: Joel is heading toward the SOL's galley when he inadvertantly enters the 'We-Zone' (an area controlled by Servo and Tom). (
Tom): "A world that revolves around
us, and
only us"! Joel is challenged! He must perform the "disappearing coin trick" to be allowed to pass through the zone. He succeeds. It is then demanded of Joel to perform the "Snow Storm in China" trick. Can't do! He doesn't have the right props. (
Crow): "Do the 'Greasy Duck Face'"! It's too much for Servo and Crow. He grosses the Bots out! "Now, do a handstand"! No problem. Joel is finally allowed to pass and makes his way to the ships galley to get some food.
Host 2: Cambot's 'Comedy Sitcom Simulator' malfunctions... (basically, Cambot lays down a laughtrack after every line of dialogue anyone on the SOL bridge delivers). Not funny.
Host 3: Joel and the Bots play 'Robot Holocaust' , but Joel and Crow aren't having a good time (wearing road kill furs and all...). They quit and leave Servo to his own imaginative devices.
End: The "Name the Plant Guy from the film" contest is announced. Joel reads a couple of fan letters. Larry 'files this one' (
again) for Dr. F.
Items of Note:~ The Commando Cody film short appears to break about less than 5 minutes in, and never resumes. Are we grateful? Yes or No?
~ Joel goes to the projection booth and fixes everything in order to view today's experiment. Why?!
Personal Notes:~ The Cambot malfunction in 'Host 2' reminded me of listening to any given episode of "Three's Company" (or any network sitcom for that matter!)
~ The film is Angelica Jager's (
Valaria) only credited screen appearance ever.
~ It personally feels like Josh's (
Servo) heart just wasn't really into this episode.
The 'Riffs':~ (
Crow) "Where are you going to ditch a 'high gloss, plywood Moon vehicle'?"
~ (
Joel): "Okay, Honey! Am I a fruit, or am I a vegetable"?
~ (
Robot): "He speaks to me telepathically". (
Servo): "It's more like Tele
pathetically"!
~ (
Valaria): "Perhaps, it is time to send Torque"! (
Joel): "Yes. And send Dolenz and Nesmith too"!
~ (
Crow): "Hey, who's the guy in the 'Huggies'"?! (
Joel): "Well... that 'Depends'"!
~ (
Neo): "If they had known we were coming..." (
Joel): "...they'd have baked a cake"!
Pop culture references spanning such people and topics as Lloyd Bridges, Ron Howard's "Eat My Dust", Muddy Waters and The Solid Gold Dancers, as well as American Gladiators, The Monkees, Dial deodorant and Spinal Tap. A good MST episode, but I can't get past the totally '80's look and sensibilities of the main feature. It's movies like this that make 'Plan 9' or 'Robot Monster' look good! God... I
HATE Robot Holocaust!!!
Rating: 2 'Sock Puppet Monsters' out of 5
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